It’s called the “RMV Scavenger Hunt!” Here’s what you do:

1. Go to the RMV to register your car like a good little Massachusetts resident. Wait for an hour.
2. Fill out the paperwork, get your registration and plates. Yay!
3. Go to get your state-mandated safety inspection.
4. Be told that you can’t get your inspection done, because your car doesn’t show up in the system. Be told this is because the girl at the RMV listed the following things incorrectly on your registration:
   1. Your car’s make (It’s a Subaru, not a Ford)
   2. Your car’s type (It’s a Station Wagon, not a sedan)
   3. Your insurance information (you have Geico, not Government Employee Insurance)
5. Go back to the RMV to fix your paperwork. Wait for an hour and a half.
6. Get the above information corrected and an apologetic smile from Mr. RMV.
7. Go back to the inspection place to get your state-mandated saftey inspection.
8. OOPS! Turns out, the original RMV lady entered your VIN number wrong, as well!
   1. Yes, the VIN number. You know, the single most important piece of information about your car. Ever.
   2. Remember, this woman was entering this information DIRECTLY OFF OF A FORM THAT YOU HAD FILLED OUT. And was also, apparently, illiterate.
9. Go back to the RMV for a third time, to fix your paperwork again. Wait for an hour and a half.
10. Be informed that, for a VIN number change, you have to get a visual inspection at the nearest police station. And you can’t come back to the RMV that day, because by that point in the day they’re about to close. But it’s okay, you can come back in four days, since they’re off for Columbus Day.
11. Go to the police station and obtain a visual inspection to verify that, yes, the VIN number is not what it’s supposed to be. Get to talk to a nicely sympathetic (and rather confused) police officer.
12. Wait two days.
13. Consider murder.
14. Wait two more days.
15. Return to the RMV for a fourth time, to fix your paperwork.
16. Get spotted in line by the guy who helped you last week, who recognizes you, takes pity on you, and takes you to his boss, who fixes your form.
17. Triple-check your new registration form when boss lady hands it to you. Find one last mistake on it that the original lady made; have it rectified.
18. Return, in triumph, to the saftey inspection place. You are now a preferred customer.
19. Receive your officially certified “Safe Car” sticker and a pat on the back from the mechanic guy.
20. Congratulations! You are now allowed to drive in the state of Massachusetts! Thanks for playing!
21. Consider murder. Just because.